New Social Systems is growing and so I have decided to hire on some help. When I hire a coach it is a process that I don’t take lightly. Ever sense I founded this company I wanted to build relationships and NOT just clients. Ask our students about the quality and value we give each person we work with. I have searched for someone like Jeremy for a long time and I asked him to write a bit about himself as an introduction to you guys. Without further ado, here is NSS’s newest coach, Jeremy!
My Succes Story or How to Make Lasting Positive Change in Your Life With a Minimal Expenditure of Time and Effort
by Jeremy Taylor
The lowest points of your life are always the most important. People in Alcoholics Anonymous always talk about how alcoholics need to hit “rock bottom” before they are finally ready to make a change. I’ve hit rock bottom several times in my life, first when I was more than sixty pounds overweight, and second was after a major divorce. The result of both of these situations caused me to make tremendous progress in my life. Without these low points, I would not be here sharing my story:
I grew up in a small town in the southwestern part of the United States. There weren’t a lot of people there, and there weren’t a lot of things going on either. I was born into a large family, I was the second born in a family of seven children. My family didn’t have a lot of money, but all of my needs were met. Still, I remember being made fun of at school for not having the best clothes or the coolest stuff. I think this was the start of my downward spiral because I believed what my peers told me. I believed that I was not good enough, because I didn’t have the same things they did.
The ridicule I experienced at school, combined with the anxiety of adolescence caused me to overeat. As I entered puberty I began to gain more and more weight, peaking at about 265 pounds at my full measure of 6’3”. This was a terrible combination because I was now the fat kid as well as the poor kid. This wreaked havoc on my self-esteem and self-confidence and as a result, I couldn’t work up the courage to talk to girls at my school, so I never dated all through high school. Instead, I studied hard, got good grades, and went on to college.
When I started my first year at college I came to the realization that I was in control of my life. I was sick and tired of being overweight and I wanted a girlfriend or at least a few hookups here and there.I made the decision in that moment that I would get in shape no matter what it took. This was one of the big moments in my life. Once you really make that decision to change, nothing can stop you.
So I did what any studious nerd would do and looked for information online on how to lose weight and get in shape. I also took a few weightlifting classes at my school. And I got results! I went from weighing 265 and being weak and out of shape to about weighing 215 and being strong and muscular.
I didn’t know it then, but I discovered the magic formula of success that ANYONE can use to improve any area of their lives:
Desire àDecision àKnowledge à Action à Success
The desire comes first, it’s often something like “I want a girlfriend” or “I want to be lean and healthy”. Sometimes it’s recognizing what you don’t want: “I don’t want to be fat” or “I don’t want to be alone”. Both ways of thinking eventually lead to the next step: the decision to change. This is the most important step. If you do not make that decision to get what you want no matter what, then you will not put in the effort that it will take to actually make the change for good.
Knowledge Allows You to Benefit From Those Who Have Gone Before You
The third step is to find out how to get what you want. This step is not as important as the first two, but can really help shorten the time that it will take you to actually make the change. Knowledge allows you to benefit from those who have gone before you. It allows you to do the right things first while minimizing the mistakes you make. The tricky thing about knowledge though, is that it is sometimes unreliable. Not everyone has your best interest at heart, some people will sell “how to” books that do not work simply because they know they can get away with it. To avoid getting bad information, you have to learn from many different people.
This is the reason we decided to publish NSS Weekly, to give you access to the best information out there from a variety of experts on the subject. When you learn from different people who are teaching you how to get the same results, you eventually start to see a common thread amongst the various curriculums. Once you discover this common thread, then you can personalize it and make it your own.
When You Make the Decision to Change, Taking Action is Not a Problem
Action comes next. All the knowledge in the world will not benefit you if you don’t take action. The good news, however, is that if you’ve truly made the decision to change, action is often not a problem. When I decided to lose weight and get in shape, I immediately started going to the gym and eating healthier food and less off it. Later, when I decided to improve my interactions with women, I started going out and meeting women on a regular basis, implementing the various ideas that I had learned.
The Quickest Way from Point A to Point B
When you follow this formula, you get results – fast. I know I did. When I applied this formula to my health and fitness the pounds just seemed to disappear. This transformation gave me a new sense of confidence; I could now work up the courage to talk to girls. A lot of the women I met liked me too, but I still had no idea of what to do with women, and as a result, I experienced no success. I had the desire, but I had not yet actually made the decision to improve my dating life. Part of the reason why I didn’t make the decision then was because I didn’t know that you could actually learn to interact better with women. Can you believe that? It seems so strange to me now that it didn’t occur to me to seek out information on how to improve my skills with women.
Looking back, knowing what I know now, there were a ton of girls that I met who were practically throwing themselves at me, but I just didn’t know that it was my responsibility to make the transition from friends or acquaintances to lovers.
‘Tis Better to Have Loved and Lost…
The next defining moment of my life happened a few years later, at the age of 21. I was home from school and regularly attending my parent’s church. My dad told me that there was a young woman there who was admiring me from a distance. She worked at a restaurant near my dad’s work and apparently she had told him that she thought I was cute. But my past inadequacies prevented me from talking to this girl. My reasoning was that she was just messing with me or that she wanted to tease me. It didn’t occur to me that she actually wanted to get with me. I had such a low opinion of myself, that I could not possibly fathom that I was actually attractive to women. I had transformed my body, but I had not yet transformed my mind so I continued to ignore the not so subtle hints that I should ask this girl out.
Finally, her dad got sick of her constantly raving and pining over me and basically commanded me to take her out on a date. We connected immediately and were inseparable after that. We had a lot in common and this girl was beautiful to boot. She was 19 years old, about 6’1” in height with a slender body and blonde hair. She had even done some runway modeling in the city where she had previously lived.
The Reckless Decisions of a Love-struck Young Man
I was lovesick at this point. I’d never experienced anything like this before. The relationship progressed way too fast and I asked her to marry me after having only known her for two weeks. This was partially because both of our parents were Mormons and also because it’s actually quite common to see people getting engaged quickly in the Mormon religion. I was also too lovesick to stop and consider what I was getting myself into. The emotions I was experiencing were overwhelming. It was the first time I had experienced romantic love.
We were married a short time later, and moved in together to finish up our University education. I quickly learned that there were aspects of this woman that were not apparent in our initial interactions. Many of these aspects were unacceptable to me, but I put up with them anyway because we were married and I didn’t know what else to do. I had overlooked a lot of warning signs during our courtship and engagement because I was so desperate for female companionship.
The Devastating Divorce
Fast forward about two and half years of not so blissful marriage and my wife tells me that she wants to part ways. I was devastated, even though deep down I knew it was the right thing to do. Still, it was me who was rejected and it sent me on an emotional roller coaster. I decided during this time that this would never happen to me again, and that I would get this part of my life handled, once and for all.
Like anyone does after a relationship ends, I wanted to get laid to validate my attractiveness. My initial efforts were futile, because I still had no idea what I was doing, but this time was different. I had hit rock bottom and as a result, I made the decision to change. My past results were no longer acceptable to me. I never again wanted to experience loneliness and rejection. I wanted to get this part of my life handled so that I would never have to worry about it again. So once again, I followed my magic formula.
One Book Changed My Entire Life
I started looking for information online and eventually stumbled upon a book that changed my entire life. Within a month of reading that one book and going out and meeting people, I was able to seduce a woman the same day I had met her. The most interesting part about this was that when I met her she was with a guy that she was dating at the time and she ditched him to go hang out with me.
Anything is Possible
I was ecstatic at my new discovery. I couldn’t believe how easy it really was. I always thought that being attractive to women was either something you had or you didn’t have. Making that transition was a defining moment of my life. Because I had done something that I had previously thought impossible I felt like anything was possible.
I learned more, and got better and better. My friends who had known me for years were amazed. I told them that I felt like a completely different person, to which my friends replied that I was actually the same except I was now hooking up with beautiful women.
A Request From a Friend
My friend Eddie noticed my sudden change of social life and asked if I could teach him to do the same thing. I didn’t want to at first, partially because I didn’t want to deal with the extra competition, and also because I was having too much fun to stop share what I knew. After much begging and pleading from Eddie I finally agreed to help him improve. It wasn’t easy at first; he had a lot of bad habits just like I did when I first started out. But sure enough, in less time than I had initially thought, he was having some really great interactions with attractive women. It felt really good to help my friend improve his life.
I realized in that moment, that this was my calling. I love sharing knowledge and helping people improve their lives. That’s why I decided to join up with New Social Systems as editor-in-chief for NSS Weekly. As editor-in-chief my purpose is to provide you with the best information available to help you improve your social life and success with women. I am committed to your success, but that is not enough. You too must also commit to your success. It is my promise to you that if you decide now to change and follow the formula for success that you will make sweeping positive changes in your life.